Periodically, life
will hand us unplanned difficulties, which are impossible to
ignore and challenging to overcome. The situation is exasperated
when working on a dissertation as we strive to finish our student
careers and make the transition to professional life. Yet these
unexpected trials are the landmarks of life that shape our being.
Recently, we watched
in disbelief as terrorism took on a new meaning. Though we might
not have known anyone involved in the incident, we understood
their pain and grieved with millions of others. Grief also comes
upon us through other life-altering events – divorce, the
adoption or birth of a child with special needs, personal illness,
etc.
For myself, grief
came earlier this year while I was fully absorbed in analyzing
the results of my dissertation research. My Dad was diagnosed
with terminal cancer. Over the next two months, his condition
rapidly deteriorated until he passed away.
During this time,
people still asked the age-old question: "So, how’s the
dissertation going?" Typically, I shared my story in a few short
sentences. What surprised me most was discovering other ABDs
who were struggling with the same type of life-altering events.
From their experiences
and now through my own grief, I have learned that each person
responds to life’s tribulations in their own way. Yet,
there are resources of strength that universally help everyone
endure. Perhaps these tips will assist you in getting through
a challenging stretch of life and seeing the dissertation to
its completion.
- Slow down.
Contending with life changing circumstances requires a great
deal of energy. Chances are that you’ll be dealing not
only with the pain of the loss, but all of the events surrounding
it – developing new patterns of living, managing legal
documents and processes, and perhaps assisting other family
members.
- Don’t
make any big life changes.
This isn’t easy. After all, we’re supposed to finish
the dissertation in order to find a new job and begin our
career as scholars and practitioners. In my case, I began
to interview for jobs before finishing the dissertation. Thankfully
a friend helped me to see that I was trying to force closure
on this phase of life by taking a new job and moving to a
new location. Staying in graduate school another year gives
me greater stability, more time to finish the dissertation,
prepare for a major job hunt and supports the healing process.
- Seek Encouragement
Hopefully, you’re fortunate enough to be surrounded by
friends, family and faculty, who respond to your unguarded
comments and audible sighs. You can also turn to those resources
which you find most comforting in life, whether that be a
church, religious or philosophical beliefs, or a particular
set of writings that have inspired you in the past.
- Learn more
about the grief process
A good book to keep on your shelf is Surviving the Loss
of a Love. First printed in the 1960s, it’s become
a classic in the field of grieving. The authors summarize
the effects of grief and provide helpful ideas on "how to"
survive. You can also learn how to endure by finding others
who have experienced a similar loss.
- If the grief
becomes too difficult to bear, get help
There’s no shame in asking for help. Most campuses have
made arrangements for students to have access to counselors
or may have a telephone "help" line. Chances are you’ve
paid for these services through student fees, so why not get
your money’s worth?
- Rekindle the
passion for your topic of study.
I had not only lost sight of the value of my research, but
had lost my zeal for writing. To overcome my indifference,
I began rereading some of the classic works of writers. Their
stories renewed my interest and reminded me that they too
struggled to write during difficult times. I also recalled
the reasons for choosing my particular field of study and
dissertation topic. These are the matters with which I am
passionate and my research will make a positive contribution.
- Learn to keep
a balance in life.
Trying times remind us that there’s more to life than
dissertations, work and classes. It’s important to keep
a balanced perspective on our personal and professional life.
- Realize that
life will become more routine.
You may be forced to put the dissertation on hold for awhile.
That’s understandable. However, the time will come (trust
me) when the shock wears off and each passing day becomes
more routine. This is the time to regroup and refocus. Talk
to your dissertation chair to let them know what’s going
on and ask them to help you evaluate your progress appropriately.
You might even be surprised to find that they too were ABD’s
undergoing a life-changing event.
Continue to persevere.
Determination is needed to complete your dissertation. You’ve
made it through a most horrific struggle and have become stronger;
the struggle to complete the dissertation pales in comparison.
You can do it!
Charlotte Sullivan,
ABD is a doctoral student in the Higher Education Administration
Program at The University of Texas at Austin. She serves as
the Logan Wilson Fellow in the Office of Graduate studies and
can be reached at casullivan@mail.utexas.edu
